What does having faith really mean?
Faith is to believe what you do not see; the reward of this faith is to see what you believe.
A lot of times. When people talk about having faith they say things like:
“I have faith it’ll work out”
“God is gonna work it out. By faith.”
Or they quote scriptures like:
In the interest of being truly transparent and speaking for myself , and myself only, I will say that when I have quoted those things I am really wishing that God will give me my way and in the way I see my way happening.
But if this whole move and leap of faith has taught me anything else, it’s that, that just ain’t how faith works.Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase. Click To Tweet
When we moved here, I knew we wouldn’t have income. At least for a little while.
Two months tops, I thought. And in my mind that was fine.
I figured that by moving in the center of Research Triangle, hubby being an IT professional, he would have a job easily. Without much effort.
I thought he’d follow my advice for establishing his training business.
I also thought he’d find training clients without issue.
Well none of that has happened.
Once we got settled. I started working on the transition to my new site. New branding. And building my new business.
Hubs started looking for training positions.
He interviewed and got turned down for a few. In the same way he did when he had first graduated with his IT degree. Being told there were people more qualified than he was.
Then he got hired. And he got hired again.
Thing is, he got hired at a job that was entry level at best. And only part time. Oh, and only one day a week guaranteed, with an opportunity to pick up shifts occasionally. Making enough to cover putting gas in my SUV.
Then he got hired as a trainer. That’s great right?
It was a 45 minute commute both ways. And Commission Only. Which means he was spending money (in gas) to go with the guarantee that he would “possibly” make money.
He went every day, working eight hour days. Making nothing. Not a dime. Trying to build clientele. All, having faith that it would pick up and work out.
Not quite what his “having faith” looked like originally. But he accepted the modified version and still chose to have faith.
He did this for a good month before he said, “This just doesn’t make sense.”
I’d be lying if i didn’t say that I wanted him to have drawn this conclusion sooner. But it’s all good. I had to let him do it his way.
What he decided he would do, is instead, spend those days searching for a salaried position within his experienced field of IT. And then put effort into building clientele on the side.
He’s been applying for at least 6-10 jobs a day.
But being in the Christmas season, responses are few.
We are in the middle of Christmas season. And while we normally make a list. Decide what to buy. And go buy it, without much thought. This year is different.
While my focus has never been gifts. I’d rather create experiences. This year is truly a test of that declaration.
We aren’t flat broke. We have not missed a meal. The bills are all getting paid.
And honestly it’s all by the grace of god.
But this is not what I imagined this faith move looking like when we set out on it.
And that’s ok too.
When I told one of my friends what we were doing [with the move]. I told her that it was a total leap of faith.
Her response was, “girl please. Y’all are both college graduates. Now if y’all was leaving with GED’s I’d be side eyeing you”.
I bought into that statement a bit.
I’m studying Proverbs right now. And the focus is on wisdom in my current study section.
I realize that book knowledge and wisdom are two different things and having book knowledge [degrees] is not a guarantee of having what you need. Jesus is the one that gives you that, no matter what education level you have.
So being perfectly honest, it’s scary. But this is where faith is truly tested.
No idea when the test ends. Or how it will turn out. But I am truly amazed by God working on my heart, attitude and perspective in this space.
My faith is being stretched and my view of what having faith looks and feels like is forever changed.
The truth is that having faith is a little scary. Having faith doesn’t make everything clear. And it surely doesn’t mean that God is gonna give you what you want, just how you want.
Here’s to continuing to have mustard seed faith and moving mountains.Having faith doesn't make things happen as you wish or want them to! Click To Tweet
I’m wishing you and your family a very Merry Christmas.
Check out my latest Moving Mountains Vlog. About having faith, and how I’m feeling during this time.