You can find me in the club, bottle full of bub…
Yea, or not…
Lol, that’s never really been me.
Don’t get me wrong I had a couple spurts that lasted a few months here and there. Spurts where I went HARD. But by and large my theme song would say:
You can find me on the couch, while you hanging out…
You get the point.
For a long time I would get overwhelmed at the thought of going to places with large crowds and lots of people and interaction.
If I dare indulge, you could usually find me chilling, people watching and questioning how I got there.
I was pegged as being anti-social, funny acting, and plain ol’ bourgeois (probably cause I’m light skinned – I kid I kid). I say that in jest because my husband and my friends know I’m sensitive about being called light skinned and they stay with the jokes. And attributing my “anti-social” ways to the complexion of my skin. But anyhoo….
For a long time I thought there was something wrong with me too. Because I would try to explain to people that it’s not that I don’t like people. But there is something that happens to me when I am faced with being around large groups of people.
Get me one on one and I’m a good time. And I don’t just say that myself.
If I had a dollar for every time someone had the chance to interact with me on a more personal note, only to end up saying “I thought you were a B-, but you’re actually pretty cool.” I’d have the next couple months bill money.
But as I’ve grown older and find that I feel this same way, even with my own kids and family. I realize it’s deeper than just being anti-social.
Back then, while I imagine introversion was a thing, it wasn’t really talked about how it is now.
Realizing that I am actually an introvert, who just values my time alone, and prefers more intimate interaction has opened my eyes for me to see me differently.
It helps me set boundaries
I have no problem drawing the line in the sand with people to protect my emotional being. I use to struggle with this big time. And I also worried what people thought about me a lot more too. Coming to realize my introversion changed that for me.
It helps me determine how I need to recharge
I occasionally need to get the juice back in my batteries. Particularly after having interaction with a large group of people or being in an extremely social setting.
When I go away to a conference and come home, I need a break. My family was confused, because they look at it like I have been away from them, my primary responsibility. So I had to have had some rest. Not the case.
Going to a conference usually involves a great deal of interaction and socializing. After all that, I need my batteries charged.
It helps me carve out the time I know I need to not feel overwhelmed
Whether it is that I need to leave a go get coffee alone for a bit, or go sit in my sitting area in my room with the door closed. I realize the feeling when I am overstimulated and need a break. And I have no problem taking it.
It helps me to know what kinds of situations I can and cannot put myself in and still be comfortable
Sometimes I have to decline invites to functions. Or I have to map out my exit strategy ahead of time. This helps me to not be somewhere I am uncomfortable.
I say all this to say that being an introvert is not a bad thing. It is indeed a thing and you just have to acknowledge it, define it and then make it work.
My husband jokingly talks about how I’ve come such a long way in my people skills over the years he’s known me.
But the reality is I have gotten to know me a little better. Which has helped me in my interactions with others.Getting to know me better has helped me be better with others... Click To Tweet
I decline invites to places where there will be too many people. Particularly if I don’t have someone to go with me and have that one-on-one interaction that makes me sane.
It’s not because I don’t like people. It’s just I can’t do big groups of them.
And if I do. My time is very limited.
Social media changed the game for me. It allows me to interact without having to be physically present. Contrarily, it gives me an escape route when I feel stuck and overwhelmed In a group setting.
Yup I’m the girl that will be scrolling through my timelines and in my own tunnel.
So if you know me personally and didn’t know this about me, I hope this explains things a bit.
And if you meet me and think I’m weird, know I’m just on the introverted side of the spectrum but I probably think you are awesome!