I wish I could tell you I have this whole co-parenting thing down and my family functions as a well oiled machine.
But I don’t!
As much as I would love for it to be the case, at this time it is just not my reality. There are several pieces and parts that make up the situation and I don’t control all of them.
I also wish that I could tell you that I am doing my part, with the pieces I do have control over as I wait on the other pieces to fall into place, but I cant tell you that either.
What I can tell you is that I am trying; constantly trying to do better. This is not one of those bitter I hate my baby daddy posts, instead, I’d like to share with you MY perspective on some things that you should pray for, for your ex even when you cant stand them.
I know, I know!! You’re probably wondering why would you do that?
Well because they affect your child and you love your child ….
So here goes:
A good home
You want your ex to have a nice home, in a nice neighborhood. This way when your child leaves you, you aren’t losing sleep worrying about their well being and if they are OK. They should have a comfortable space that they feel at home in when they are gone with your ex.
A good significant other/spouse
There is nothing worse than seeing someone who doesn’t like the children of their significant other because of something they have nothing to do with. Or even if it is something to do with the kid, they’re just a kid, soooo yea pretty much the same thing.
It’s in the child’s and your best interest that your ex gets a good person in their life so that you all can function in the best interest of the child TOGETHER, and so that the child has someone who cares about them as much as you do (or as close as possible) and someone who is a good example for your child when they are away from you.
A good career
You want your ex to be able to take care of their child. Regardless of how you go about having that done – through the system, a personal agreement or whatever. You want them to not only be able to but to feel confident in the fact that they are able to provide for their child’s needs and actually do it!
A happy life
Its been said that happy parents make happy children. While I am sure there are some exceptions to this rule, generally speaking you can see how this could be the case. When kids are comfortable and loved (by both parents) they tend to have better confidence, which leads to better grades, a greater attitude and overall positive impact on their social development.
While I am still working on this. I do try to pray for my ex. Not just pray that I don’t kill him, but pray that he figures it out and finds his way in all these areas so that my daughter reaps the benefits.
When you can’t forgive someone,
PRAY FOR THEM
It may or may not change them,
BUT IT WILL ALWAYS CHANGE YOU!